1/9/09

Have Your Cinnamon Roll Cookies and Eat Them Too!



So, I don't even know where to begin... other than I obviously don't pay attention to diddly squat. To be honest, I don't watch much television and I haven't been listening to the radio as much either. So what I heard this morning, kinda shocked me.

Driving home after dropping Katie off from school and paying attention to nothing in general, I hear this commercial, "I love my wife but she's my best friend. There's no sizzle." and "I'm married but looking for more."

"Ooooookay" I think to myself trying to shake the morning cobwebs out of my head. Maybe I misheard, maybe it was some obnoxious radio DJ doing some stupid phony commercial, maybe I needed a cup of tea. But I didn't need a cup of tea, it wasn't an obnoxious DJ and I hadn't misheard. There's a website for married people to hook up with other married people. Didn't they used to do that in the 70's with key parties? Anyways, think of it as e-harmony but for a married person looking for someone else to have sex with no strings attached.

At seven in the morning, I could barely wrap my head around this notion. I know people have affairs all the time but isn't it suppose to be on the down low.... off the record, on the QT, and very hush-hush? This ad was very disturbing in it's frankness, to be honest. I mean, I of all people, love frankness but this felt dirty even for someone, who on more than one occasion, has been accused of having no morals and very low standards.

On their website, they offer you a 100% affair guarantee! I guess that's a bonus and if you don't get some of that affair action you were looking for, do you get your money back? That's what I want to know. And as an extra bonus, Ashley Madison uses "Life is short. Have an affair." as their slogan. Life is going to be real short for someone with a spouse who has a bad temper and a shotgun. I see dead people and lawsuits.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who hasn't heard of Ashley-Madison because right about now I feel really old and out of touch. Shocked, I tell you, shocked!

So I bet your wondering how I am going to tie in having an affair with cinnamon roll cookies? Well, this is like having your cake and eating it too. If you cut these cookies a little thicker than what is called for they are like a little mini cinnamon rolls and if you cut them a little thinner than called for you have a nice tender but crispy cookie.



Cinnamon Roll Cookies: Culinary Concoctions by Peabody

(A couple notes. First, this recipe does have a recipe for icing but I don't like icing on my cookies, so I didn't include it here because I didn't make the icing. Duh! But the link does have the recipe. And...of the three times I made this recipe, never once did I added half the cinnamon filling on the outside of the roll like the recipe calls for. So I didn't include that in this recipe either. Also, I suck at baking because Peabody's look so much better than mine. Mine look like when you come home with an art project in first grade and your mom says, "That's beautiful, dear. You are so artistic." while trying to keep a straight face. Yeah, mine are artistic, that's what I keep trying to tell myself. Denial is a very powerful river in Egypt.)

Filling:

1/2cup sugar
2 tbsp ground cinnamon
juice from half a orange
and a little bit of freshly grated orange rind

For the dough:

3 cups all-purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp ground cinnamon
½ tsp salt1 cup unsalted butter, at room temperature
1 cup brown sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla extract

Combine sugar, 2 tbsp cinnamon, orange juice and freshly grated orange rind in a small bowl and set aside. Whisk flour, baking powder, 1 tsp cinnamon, and salt together for the dough in a bowl, set aside. Cream butter and brown sugar in a bowl with a mixer until smooth. Add the eggs and vanilla; mix until incorporated. With the mixer on low speed, add the dry ingredients, blending just to incorporate; do not over mix.

Trace a 16-x-9-inch rectangle on a sheet of parchment or wax paper. Pat the dough into the rectangle using your hands.



Then sprinkle the cinnamon mixture over the dough.



Beginning on a long side and using the paper to help you, roll the dough into a log. Wrap log in plastic and chill for at least 3 hours.



Preheat oven to 350F; line two baking sheets with parchment paper. Slice chilled dough into 1/4-inch thick slices and arrange on prepared baking sheets, spacing 1 inch apart. Bake 10-12 minutes, or until golden brown. Let cookies cool on the pan for 5 minutes, then transfer to a rack.



Tasting Notes: You've got cinnamon rolls in my cookies! You've got cookies in my cinnamon rolls! They are that good.

27 comments:

KitchenKiki said...

Yikes! I hope Ashley Madison is just a West Coast thing, that is just wrong. I'm certainly not a prude, but encouraging affairs? Too much for my morning.
Now I need a cinnamon roll!

Kristin said...

I never heard of that particular one, but I do remember seeing a news segment about a website called "Married but Looking." EW.

What I want to know: What's the ratio of men to women using those sites? I gotta think it's at least 80 percent men.

SaintTigerlily said...

I have never heard of that and I think it's disgusting.

MichelleB said...

I have heard commercials for Ashley Madison, but I didn't realize it was for married people! The ad that I heard made it sound like it was single people with a boyfriend/girlfriend. Don't get me wrong - I still found that HORRIBLY WRONG and was quite disgusted. Of course, now I'm even more disgusted with the whole thing. Gag.

I need to make me some cookies to get the dirty taste out of my mouth.

Cheryl said...

No idea who Asley Madison is :( and that commercial, thats just gross, I cant imagine. However, I know someone who is gonna love those cookies!

mindy said...

"life is short. have an affair." !?!?!?!

no, i was under the same rock as you. call me old-fashioned, but WTF? crazy.

lcsa99 said...

Oh man, those look great. And of course you had to post these right after I promised to stay away from cookies for a while LOL

DiaperPin Up Girl said...

What the hell. I wouldn't be able to wrap my mind around that at 7 am either.

BUT I will be wrapping my mouth around the cookies tomorrow. Yum

Grace said...

krysta--your cookies are full of win, most unlike this ashley-madison issue. ridiculous.

Mrs. L said...

These look great. And I'm with you, I heard about the website on the radio and I was "what the h????".

Mayberry Magpie said...

S.H.O.C.K.E.D.

Nearly speechless.

Course I am the woman who thought the man exposing himself to me must not have realized he was out of his pants.

But this? Open affairs and an agency to help you? Good grief.

Oh, BTW, have you seen the TV ads for the "sugar daddy" agency? Also unbelievable!

Rebecca (Foodie With Family) said...

I've never heard of this Ashley Madison outfit but it makes me feel all gaggy. Ew. Double Ew.

On the plus side those cookies look sinful in a good way. Not a gaggy way.

Elisabeth Forsythe said...

I heard that ad a couple of days ago on my way to work and couldn't believe it! I like how they timed the ad to reach busy professionals during rush hour. Jesus! :P

asthmagirl said...

I've never heard of Ashley Madison either. Ewww. Just Ewww.

But the cookies look good. Really good! Did you use your cinnamon that you won?

Now I feel like baking cookies!

noble pig said...

No I have never heard of that. It's on the radio? Are you sure you weren't reading a bathroom wall? Weird, weird.

The cookies though are awesome.

Jamie said...

Yes, I am shocked with the idea of a married persons "dating" service. How creepy is that? But the cookies look great and I think I would've also gone straight home, baked cookies and eaten them all just to ease my mind and forget about all the horrible people out there in the world!

melissa said...

...the feck?

By the way, hi, I'm Melissa and I'm a bad friend who has been totally remiss about visiting you. :(

Going to catch up now...

The Short (dis)Order Cook said...

I looked at this recipe and wonder why no one thought of such a cool idea before.

There is a website called Dump Your Wife Now, which features Ashley Madison prominently. There is a lot of creey stuff out there.

Julie said...

No I haven't hear of Ashley Madison either...I kinda like it that way! I'll just eat one of your cookies and pretend the world is normal.

Undomestic Diva said...

I can't even wrap an intelligent thought around that.

And I am so in love with your photography.

Anne Stesney said...

W. T. F.

That's all I gotta say about Ashley Madison.

Your cookies look too delicious to be artistic.

Sara said...

These are so cute, I'm sure they taste delicious too!

Weight Loss said...

Hello. Just found this article about eating healthy
and Resturants. Great tips on how to stay thin and
healthy even tho you want to eat out more.
Hope this helps anyone who eats out alot.

http://emergevictoriousoverfat.com/2009/01/how-to-lose-weight-even-while-eating-restaurant-food/

MrOrph said...

Um yeah. I got an email from the president offering me $30 off of their $49 fee to join:

Dear mrorph,

I am Noel Biderman, President of The Ashley Madison Agency, and I want to personally invite you to experience something that will change your life this year. AshleyMadison.com



I was like...whiskey...tango...foxtrot!!!

Here is the president's email: Noel@AshleyMadison.com

Let's send him a message, shall we?

On...cookies look marvelous!

Not Afraid to Use It said...

What a bizarre way to start the morning. I'd much rather have a roll.

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