Ollie, Ollie, Oxen Pizza!

Business first because once you meet this little guy he'll steal your heart. Potato Ho-Down entries need to be in by August 17th. Click here for details.
Everyone meet Colin or Ollie. This kid has totally stolen my heart! You have no idea how rare that is. After having four kids there is no biological clock ticking in me. It's a dry, barren wasteland. When I see a baby, my nipples don't lactate and my uterus does not ache. I have no urge to have another. When I see a baby, I think 'Oh, that's nice.' and go on my merry way. It's not even a blip on the radar. It's so dry that I have made it pretty clear I don't really want to watch my nephews or nieces until they are over the age of two. I find babies boring, even when they were my own. I like them more interactive without the stinky diaper smell. I'm the W.C. Fields of the soccer mommy set. But Colin, all of three years old makes me want to have another... if the baby was just like him.

Now in the interest of not playing favorites. Colin has a brother and sister who are equally as cool as Ollie but on this day Ollie was hanging around me and his other siblings were out and about playing with my fearsome foursome.

Mr. Ollie was bound and determined to help me cook. He was going to make pizza with me. No. Matter. What. His parents call him bossy, I beg to differ. He was not pushy, snotty, or whiny like other little three year olds can be. Nope, he very firmly but calmly stated that, 'Krysta, I want to help' while his hands were hovering right over the pizza dough waiting for me to say yes. Once I said yes, Colin ran to the bathroom and washed his hands (No joke, I didn't even ask), grabbed a stool, and flattened and stretched the dough. He also spread the pizza sauce and sprinkled mozzarella cheese, olives, and other assorted toppings over the pizzas. All with minimal and I mean, minimal help. I know why I like him, he's independent and vocal, with minimum fuss. My kind of kid.

Here what Ollie made.

Starting clockwise from the top: Mushroom and bell peppers, jalapeno and bacon, and tomato and peperoncini. Yes, the last was stolen blatantly from Noble Pig. I have had this in sandwich form for the last couple days, it is that good.

A three year made these without my help. I am useless, pretty soon my kids will be writing this blog for me.

Pizza dough recipe here.

If you haven't made this recipe, we can't be friends anymore. It's so easy, pretty much idiot proof. I can actually make dough that's good. Now if I get off my duff and make a sourdough starter, I will rule the world with my pizza dough making skillz. I will be so good at pizza dough I can spell the word skills with a z and you won't be able to do anything but bask in the presence of the Z and my total world dominance. Ask me or anybody in my family about me being the supreme commander of the universe. Seriously, I am. Didn't you know that your rubbing computer keys with the most awesomest person ever? Yeah, neither did I.

For the pizza sauce:
1 12 ounce can of tomato paste
a little drizzle of olive oil
enough italian seasoning and garlic powder to make the pizza sauce smell like a pizza Scratch 'n' Sniff sticker.

Heat in a saucepan over low to medium heat.

Add whatever toppings look good. Bake in a oven at the highest heat possible or grill.

Who remembers Scratch 'n' Sniff Stickers? My fifth grade teacher used to hand them out as rewards. In fifth grade, I think I would have sold my soul to the devil for more stickers or at the very least shanked someone at the playground for theirs.

My favorites as a kid, in no particular order:

Root Beer Float
Peaches and Cream
and of course...

Now as an adult I would want these Scratch 'n' Sniff stickers:

Jack and Coke
Dark Chocolate
Garlic and Onion
Freshly baked cookies

What would be your favorites?


me again said...

My choices:

* the smell of barbecue; real, slow-cooked-with-wood barbecue
* the smell the house gets on Christmas day when the turkey is roasting
* the smell you get when you walk into a bakery

Anonymous said...

OMG I never thought of that on pizza...now I have to do it! That kid does seem dang cute...sadly my uterus often gives me pings and pangs.

Melissa said...

That's SO amazing that he helped and made good stuff. At 3! He's adorable for sure. Not that my uterus is aching or anything. Not for me.

I totally remember those stickers. I love how you used that description re. the Italian seasoning and garlic powder.

And I am loathe to make pizza dough. I'm always mentioning it, but I had a bad experience once and it scared me off. Soon, very soon, I need to slay that dragon. I'll bookmark Deb's (well, Jim Lahey's)recipe for it.

Katie said...

Tell Ollie I want him to make some pizzas for me! :)

I am so glad you included that little bit about Potato Ho Down...I thought I was too late! I've had a recipe in mind for a while.

MrOrph said...

So cool to have a helper like that!

I always wanted scratch n sniff at sites that has Halle Berry. Does that make me weird?

The Cutting Edge of Ordinary said...

Pina Colada
Onions and garlic
Bread baking
Cinnamon Buns

mine are all food! Geesh lemme throw a non food one in...
Patchouli, yes that's the hippie in me.

Kristin @ Going Country said...

Fresh bread
Tomato plants
Basil (I know, I know, this was one of yours--you'll share, right?)

Anonymous said...

I no longer have a uterus, but if I did, he would have revved it up!

sticker: Pizza, barbecue, limes!

Do you want a start off of my sourdouch starter?

Jennifer said...

LOL I am uterusless as well! is that word? Cute as hell kid! and he can come cook for me any day.

Jennifer said...

LOL I am uterusless as well! is that word? Cute as hell kid! and he can come cook for me any day.

Anonymous said...


We have grand niece who has been into food since age 3. At age 8 she got taken to a children's course at CIA on desert making.

Lisa said...

Ha! I loved those. My favorite was peppermint.

But now I'd go for bacon. Or basil.

grace said...

some kids are so very adorable, while some i can't seem to tolerate for more than a minute. ollie's definitely adorable. :)

my stickers of choice:
cinnamon (shocker, i know)

Anonymous said...

Mmmmm... You make me hungry. Damn it.

Anonymous said...

Ollie is adorable indeed! I don't have any children yet, but I really hope my kids love making pizza and playing with dough and helping out in the kitchen when they do arrive. I spend a lot of time daydreaming about all the yummy things we'll make and do actually, lol.

Snooty Primadona said...

Ollie is too cute! I must admit that I seldom had the patience to allow the kids to cook anything, lol. As a result, the only things either of them can cook is scrambled eggs, Ramen noodles and Quesadillas.

For Scratch & Sniff I'd like to try:

1. Rosemary
2. Oregano
3. Dirty Martinis (can that be a smell?)

Maggie said...

COLLIN!!!! That kid is the sweetest, most inquisitive three year old I have ever met!!!

Anonymous said...

You are so motherly, it's cwazee!!! But seeing how truly cute Mr. Ollie is, it kinda give me some motherly urge too......kinda.
What a fun pizza party, you are too cool. This has got to be the ultimate kids pizza party beyond my typical 5 buck chuck from Little Ceasars. That's all my neighbor kids deserve!:)
-frozen burritos
-french fries
-more french fries

-stinky cheese
-french fries
-spicy noodle soups
-more french fries!!!!!

Mental P Mama said...

Cabernet and bacon

dlyn said...

Probably now it would the back of my husband's neck, right after a shower when he has on a bleached and line-dried Tshirt. OOOO baby! Love the pizzas and the little baker!

Sharon said...

Ollie is such a cutie and makes a mean pizza!

My scratch 'n sniff would be homemade cookies and my husband's cologne.

Anne Stesney said...

That's some fine lookin' pizza! And you're right, your nephew is crazy cute.

My scratch n sniff would be roast beef in the oven.

Stacey Snacks said...

I never had that "feeling" or gave in to the pressure of having kids, so I didn't! and though I love them, I never regret my choices.

Favorite scratch n sniff (food only!)

fresh lime
dark chocolate
cooked garlic & onions

Leah said...

My all time favorite scratch & sniff as a kid was POPCORN! I still remember exactly what that sticker looked like too....I also vividly remember the folder that I had them all over....ah, grade school.

My grown up sticker would have to be a mint/cilantro combo...I'd never get tired of scratching and sniffing that smell!

The pizzas look fab'!

Anonymous said...

Ollie's got some great tastebuds to put those combos together. I love self-sufficient kids.

My favorite scratch-n-sniff scents?

roasted root veggies and potatoes with garlic and onion

the smell of vinegar boiling in brine for pickles

lemon and lime zest


fresh rosemary

...aaaaaand fresh bread both while and after baking!!!!

jennyonthespot said...

"...bask in the presence of the Z..." you kill me - that's awesome!

I too am not a huge fan of young children - even my own. My youngest is the same age as this darling Ollie. Ollie does seem sweeter :) Yep, I am happy for anyone who has a baby that cries - for THEM :)

The pizza - Shizzle! I'm watching 2 kids today - so i won't be able to go to the store... I sure hope my pantry has all that I need, cuzza THAT is what I want for dinner!

jennyonthespot said...

Oh, a scratch and sniff... martini? Margarita? And definitely - DARK chocolate :)

Aggie said...

Gosh, those pizzas look so good. I'll have to think about those scratch n sniffs!

Come by my blog when you get a chance, I have an award waiting for you! : )

Sarah said...

Go Ollie! I'm impressed!

As for stickers:

1. new car smell (toxic, but alluring)
2. sourdough bread
3. gardenias
4. oh heck, let's be honest: chocolate.

Anonymous said...

Nice job Ollie! But seriously? Did he eat them? I cannot imagine my children eating peppers of any kind. I'm jealous.

michael, claudia and sierra said...

white truffles from alba
lemon or orange zest
baking bread
fresh churned butter
roasting chicken

Deeba PAB said...

My insides will never react positively even if I see one has cute as Ollie...sweetheart that he is; but unfort life comes with no guarantees. I have just 2...hat's off to you Krysta...FOUR!!! Have to try the sourdough starter soon to get to the pizza. I'm pretty yeast confident now, so will give it a GO!!! Beautiful little pieces of art those are!!

Anonymous said...

You're three year old can cook for me anyday. They look delicious!

Anonymous said...