It's All Her Fault!

I love me some Thursday Night Smackdown. So much so, that I blantantly stole her ideas. Well, not actually. I emailed Michelle and asked if I could print two of her recipes that inspired me. See, I say I'm all evil but I can't just go steal someones idea and call it mine. It's just bad manners. Hell, I would probably write my blog just like hers but I'm too goody-goody (i.e. chicken shit) and don't want offend anybody with all the cursing. Ahh, the life I lead. I should call this blog Wussy Chef Mom. I agonize over every stupid word. For example, is someone going to object to the word wussy?

I get the feeling I could have a few shots of tequila with Michelle and she'd give me a ration of crap (shit) for not letting loose on my blog. In real life, I have a foul-foul mouth. Worse than a sailor. Worse that a ten cent whore. Michelle would then double dog dare me to sit down in front of a computer, drunk, and force me to write as my true self. Then there would be no more readers and my blog would die a slow gruesome death. I think I'll live vicariously through her blog. But anytime you are in town Michelle, I'll be more than happy to buy you a few drinks.

Sausage and Peppers Pasta: (inspired by this dish)

This dish is one of those use as much or as little as you want or need to feed your family. You know your family better than I do.

red, yellow, and green bell peppers, sliced. Do I really need to tell you to take out the seeds?

yellow onion, sliced into thin half circles

spicy Italian sausage

salt and pepper to taste


Cook pasta according to directions and salt that water! Make it taste like the ocean.

Cook the Italian sausage over high heat and break into bite size pieces. When it is cooked all the way, take out the sausage and put into a bowl. DO NOT DRAIN THE PORK FAT! LEAVE IT IN THE PAN. I said, leave it!

Okay, turn down the heat to medium and throw the onions in the pan. Let them cook until they are golden brown. Low and slow for the onions, folks. When the onions are about done, add the peppers. Cook until the peppers are tender but not over done. Who wants to eat mush? Add the sausage back into the pan and add the done pasta. Give it a few tosses and dinner is done and so freaking fanflippingtastic. It's the shizzle fritz. Only two things on this blog have gotten the shizzle fritz stamp of approval and this is one of them.

Snozzberries. This recipe for wine marinated grapes I had read about and laughed because Michelle quoted Willy Wonka. 'The Snozzeberries taste like Snozzberries.' and the only thing I could think of was 'I have a blueberry for a daughter.' and 'You boil him up, I know you did' and 'Springtime the only ring a ding time, birds sing a ding a ling a ling. Sweet lovers love the spring.' and one more for good measure...

"Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker."

Which seems apropos in this case.

Back to the snozzberries. I wasn't going to make these but while buying some stuff at Cost Plus, to some of you it's called World Market, I ran into some old co-workers and they showed me a new wine that came in. It was called Sweet Pea Apple Wine. This wine is an apple flavored wine with natural peach flavors. Guess what? It's good, not at all wine cooler-y or overly sweet. For some reason this wine called out and said, 'buy me! and use me to make snozzberries.' I did and by jove, this was really good. Everyone liked it. I caught the kids sneaking these out of the freezer.

Michelle, when CPS comes after my ass for me letting my kids eat wine marinated grapes I'm going to blame it all on you.

P.S. Can you add a post script to a blog?

P.P.S. I was awarded an award, maybe I have had too many snozzberries, because that didn't come out right. I was given an award by Ms. Snooty Patooty AKA Snooty Primadonna for Just Plain Fun to Read. Are you sure this is what you has in mind when you were thinking I was fun to read? Snozzberries, movie quotes, kids eating wine soaked grapes, CPS, and questionable language. Yeah, that's right, you know I'm a fun blog to read. Thank You.


MrOrph said...

Good pasta! And you have to love Michelle for her, um, candid insight.

I, like you, fuss over every word. I mean, an old soldier, from Philly, ex-dj, my language is extremely colorful. Just not on my blog. I have tried though. I think it is harder to find substitute words for what I REALLY want to say.

Cheryl said...

You are so funny! I also cuss like a sailor, I try to be good but it is so hard!

noble pig said...

Sweet apple tea-pea what wine? What the heck is that?

I love those little grape frozen things though...they are BU-tee-ful!

And yes, Michele is hilarious!

[eatingclub] vancouver || js said...

I love Michelle on TNS! She's hilarious, and of course, she's the one who's going to be whisked away to jail when Social Services come. Cursing all the way, of course. Way to go!

On the other hand, lovely plate of bowties and great dessert!

Magpie said...

LOL - but i think i figured out what to make for dinner...(pasta, not marinated grapes, well, maybe both...)

Bren@Flanboyant Eats said...

Michelle keeps it REAL! I'd love to sometimes on my blog, but then I get all conscious and wonder how it would ever come back to haunt me! I shouldn't care, should I??

Thanks for no longer *lurking*!! :) Had no idea you had been by, but I'm so glad.

And the salad pictured here is perfect inspiration for my new 3 week long diet. I'm on my way to Mexico, again, and I have to reclaim the same bod I had last time I was there. Do you know what eating in Mexico is like! My GOD! Amazing...But I'm sure you know!

michelle @ TNS said...

i would totally do all that WITHOUT THE BOOZE. wouldn't you know, i'm a total lightweight? one shot of tequila and i'll be asleep on your couch for the next three days.

i gotta say, if you can't drop the f-bomb on your personal blog, where the fuck can you do it?

fuckity fuckity fuck.

wouldn't you also know, i don't actually curse much in real life.

Sharon said...

Both of your blogs are great. I can't cuss on my blog because I scold my husband for cussing in the house. I figure the no cuss rule is good training for when we have little tots running around the house and I go and feed them booze soaked grapes.

melissa said...

wouldn't you also know, i don't actually curse much in real life.


I cuss a LOT. A LOOOOOOT. It's kind of horrendous.

Love that pasta, been wanting to make some semblance of it for a while now. Maybe tonight for dinner, as I have no plan yet.

Kristin said...

Mmmm, sausage . . .

EAT! said...

How am I going to get the snozzberries ready in time for happy hour today? It is already 5 pm. I guess I'll have to wait until tomorrow. sigh.

Grace said...

this is slightly random, but i enjoyed the updated willy wonka with johnny depp so much more than the original. i wonder why. probably just because of mr depp. even in his creepy costume he's a hottie. :)
anyway, great dish. i often end up with my jaw on the floor after reading a tns post. michelle definitely has a way with words... :)

Snooty Primadona said...

Hell yeah, that's what I had in mind, lol. I have a potty mouth too but have found myself taming it for the blog. The F word is my favorite, lol. I keep getting frustrated by not being able to use that word. I mean, it's so prominent in my everyday life. What the hell am I supposed to use? A real word? Pffft!

Anyway, you ARE fun to read my bloggie friend. Frankly, you crack me up totally. If you were my neighbor, we'd both be in big trouble, lol.

sista #2 said...

Would that be a Jadite dinner plate on which the pasta is being displayed?


Mayberry Magpie said...

Somebody around here might just have been tempted to suggest that my wine drinking lately has been a little excessive. Thanks to you, sista, I can hide it now in the snozzberries. Better yet, I may try to get drunk on snozzberries. How fun does that sound?

Mayberry Magpie

Meg said...

I don't curse (much) on my blog, but in real life, as often as not, I catch myself in front of the kids saying "mother-fuh... uh, uh, hmm." And then I go silent for about 5 minutes while I try and think of a way to express myself without using obscenity. I have no idea, since I have poor head-to-mouth editing, how I manage to not swear (much) in front of the kids, because, fuck, fuckwit, and motherfucker are favorite words of mine.

Laura said...

oh YUM!i made this for dinner tonight and it was soooo good! what can i say except it is freaking fanflippingtastic
i made virgin schnozzberries which were yummy but not so schozzie and i made two batches of the schnozzberries: one for tonight (oh so good and schnozzie) and one for tomorrow for the chamber of commerce mixer that we are attending.

Anonymous said...