6/17/08

Blood On My Hands...

In the last few days...

I have had to kill a rat... and by the way, how does a 14/15 year old cat with no front claws catch a rat the size of my head and then has the nerve to leave it twitching in my courtyard leaving ME to do the dirty work? I hate my cat, she's a bitch.

I have also had to dispose of a little featherless finch that fell out of his nest.

I feel like a serial killer.

Maybe I should start running around the house yelling...

"It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again."

Then maybe, just maybe, I could get locked up for a few days. A few days of drugged sedation and a padded cell are just want I need. That would be a vacation!

Enough if this... let's change the subject.

I got tagged for a meme by Katie, no, not my Katie, but by this Katie. She's fourteen and has her own food blog and makes her own jewelry. Go check her out. I'm not sure if she should be reading my blog. Hey Katie, do your parents know that you read my blog?

1) LAST MOVIE YOU SAW IN A THEATRE? I'm old, I don't go to the movies.

2.) WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? Tales Of The City by Armistead Maupin for like the billionth time.

3) FAVOURITE BOARD GAME? Pente, Scrabble, but I'd pick dominoes before anything.

4) FAVOURITE MAGAZINE? Dwell...Vanity Fair

5) FAVOURITE SMELLS? Freshly mowed grass

6) FAVOURITE SOUNDS? A baby crying... you'll understand why July 4th and my kids laughing and my husband when he laughs like Muttley .

7) WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD? Helplessness

8) WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE? Do I haaaaavvvve to get up? Yes, apparently I'm still five years old and I actually think in bold and italics when I have to get up in the morning.

9) FAVOURITE FAST FOOD PLACE? In-n-Out, In-n-Out, 'cause that's what a burger is all about.

10) FUTURE CHILD'S NAME? Shit! I'm pregnant!? Yup, I'm naming my kid... Shit! and it's middle name would be Oh Hell No! So let's get this straight my next sous chef's name would be Shit! Oh Hell No! It does have a nice ring to it.

11) FINISH THIS STATEMENT—IF I HAD A LOT OF MONEY I’D... live in Italy or in Point Reyes, Ca. I'd buy some more photo equipment, help some people...

12) DO YOU DRIVE FAST? I have a medical condition it's called leadfootitis... ba-dum-ba-dum...*crickets

13) DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? Muttley, my husband.

14) STORMS–COOL OR SCARY? Very cool

15) WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? A VW bug...that caught on fire!

16) FAVOURITE DRINK? iced tea

17) FINISH THIS STATEMENT-IF I HAD THE TIME I WOULD... take a nap!

18) DO YOU EAT THE STEMS ON BROCCOLI? Yes

19) IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY OTHER COLOUR, WHAT WOULD BE YOUR CHOICE? Red but I'd rather shave it all off.

20) NAME ALL THE DIFFERENT CITIES/TOWNS YOU HAVE LIVED IN? Only one, Stockton, Ca.

21) FAVOURITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Soccer, swimming, baseball, sumo wrestling

22) ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? I wish that at 14, I was writing instead of waiting until I was in my 30's. I also hope she keeps up her blog because I'm excited to see what she does next.

23) WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? picture frames... why, what did you think I had under there?

24) WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE BORN AS YOURSELF AGAIN? Yes, but a whole lot smarter.

25) MORNING PERSON OR NIGHT OWL? Neither... I am at my best from about 10 am to 10 pm.

26) OVER EASY OR SUNNY SIDE UP? over easy

27) FAVOURITE PLACE TO RELAX? What's that? I don't know the word relax.

28) FAVOURITE PIE? coconut cream

29) FAVOURITE ICE CREAM FLAVOUR? mint chocolate chip

30) OF ALL THE PEOPLE U HAVE TAGGED, WHO IS THE MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND FIRST? I'm not tagging anybody...

*later on today... winners of the main course part of Puppet Master and get your dessert ideas ready...

15 comments:

asthmagirl said...

You eat the stems of broccoli? Ewww! And there's no dog toys under your bed? Roxy needs to up her game! You should be tripping over dog toys big time. Our dogs have a stash in every room... just in case!

me again said...

Re #10 -- every kid needs a nickname. What's little Shit's nick gonna be?

MrOrph said...

Okay Krysta, this post had me, um, how do u say...LOL!

PUT THE ... LOTION IN THE BASKET!!!!

melissa said...

and my husband when he laughs like Muttley

HAHAHA. Rich and I would annoy people together - I laugh like Barney. ;P

And I eat broccoli stems too. Not always, but I don't really think about it.

I love memes, doing them and reading them.

Kareer Woman said...

I love reading random lists about people, great post :)

noble pig said...

That is butt-load of questions...I love broccoli stems too!

Grace said...

it's great to learn a bit more about the evil chef mom. we have a lot in common--i, too, suffer from leadfootitis, enjoy coconut cream pie and mint chocolate chip ice cream, and eat broccoli stems (they never hurt anyone!).
meanwhile, i'm sorry you've had to become a ruthless killer of animals.

Kristin said...

Evil Chef Mom becomes Evil Animal Exterminator. I am sorry you had to do all of that, and believe me, I totally understand. Animals already dead? No problem. Animals half alive that need to be mercy-killed? SUCK.

Rebecca (Foodie With Family) said...

ECM- My Mom, who does not even kill wasps- she gently traps them in mason jars and takes them out to her yard to release them-, found a big Eastern Rattler looking snake in her basement last summer. The snake was aggressive and was rattling its tail.

My little sister- age 14- was sleeping upstairs and Mom had visions of her being bit. She got so worried that she felt her only option was to kill the snake. She whacked the thing in the head with her shovel. It didn't die. She tried decaptitating it with a hoe. It didn't die. She spent 2 STINKING HOURS trying to kill the stupid thing before it finally died.

She then looked the snake up and found out it was an Eastern Milk Snake. She feels so guilty about it.

...And don't tell my hubbie I told you this, but he nicked a frog with a mower once and was so upset that he started mowing the lawn backward (pulling the mower behind him while brushing the lawn with his feet) so that he wouldn't kill snakes and frogs. He did that for years until we bought a riding mower.

ntsc said...

The cat was simply trying to make his contribution to the larder.

I so regularily had to deal with mice, rats, chipmunks, birds and rabbits we won't let the cats into the house with their playmates anymore.

One of the cats has discovered that if she chases a deer it will run.

GirlCanBake said...

How do you even begin to kill things!? I don't know how you do it... I'm amazed. I'm almost proud. If I saw a twitching rat in my garden, well, frankly I'd just run away. Far away. I might move. That seems reasonable. Thanks for sharing... and... killing?

Mayberry Magpie said...

Oh thank God you eat the broccoli stems! Remember when I said I couldn't possibly like you because you look young? Oh how wrong I was! Any woman who eats the stems is a gem in my book. (I honestly thought I was the only one.)

Mayberry Magpie
P.S. I'm insane, aren't I?

Not Afraid To Use It said...

This is SUCH a great post. I can't wait to get back to my own house so I can start cooking again.

White On Rice Couple said...

Wow, this is a serious tag! Nice to know you even more! When you're down in LA, please....let us do the driving!

Killing a rat sucks, we've had to do it...but it sure does feel good to get rid of the damn pests!

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